♥ 5063
→ 28 Sep 11 at 1 pm
→ 28 Sep 11 at 1 pm
TAKE NOTE, GIRLS!!
Print this out and carry it with you as you go!
(via ohandthesmokes)
Go, Ana, Go!
Just two best friends looking for love, laughs and of course the perfect skinny jeans. We are here to support each other and our loyal followers who are working towards the same rewarding goal. It may be hard right now, but we know it's worth it in the end.
Follow us, and we'll follow back. We all need a little thinspiration!
Peace & Love.
It would be really awesome if you didn’t.
I mean, eat.
Hi everyone!
I’m sure you hate Monday mornings just as much as I do. I mean, after a weekend of intense alcohol (Truth: ALCOHOL HAS NO CALORIES and actually helps you lose weight) consumption and continuous recreational drug use, anyone would find the infamous Monday morning absolutely UNBEARABLE!
Am I right ladies?
After losing all that weight from those fibrous screwdrivers, excessive vomiting, and cocaine snorting, you feel like you accomplished quite a bit, right? YES! You did!
And you feel like you can maybe reward yourself a bit, right? NO! NO! NO!
As our Thinspiration Guru always says,
Rewarding oneself is naught but a slippery slope.
Do you UNDERSTAND?!
Do not go out and buy a silly cookie, or a doughnut, or anything that will put your weekend’s hard work to WASTE!
THIS IS BAD:
Oh, but now you may be asking, BUT I WANT A REWARD!!
So that’s what I’m here for, something you can EAT on MONDAY MORNINGS that has next to NO calories and is actually GOOD for you:
MONDAY MORNING MEAL-ABLES!
Ok, so obviously you took the wonderful opportunity on Sunday night to drink as much fibrous alcohol as possible to help you lose those last 5 pounds.. But come Monday morning, you must be EXTREMELY exhausted and hungover and you want to eat carbs to settle your stomach. You reach for the jar of breadcrumbs your mother saved for the thanksgiving turkey (which you will obviously not eat) and before you know it, you have a handful and it’s heading towards your mouth.
STOP!
STOP I SAY! STOP IN THE NAME OF THIN!
Don’t eat the breadcrumbs plain! Treat them with the following recipe to REDUCE their CALORIC CONTENT and still get all the SATISFACTION you want!
Ok, here we go:
- Take 3 handfuls of breadcrumbs and soak them overnight in 1 part vodka and 2 parts orange juice. (I like to do this before the festivities begin on Sunday nights.)
- Drop 3 pills of IRON supplement into the mix and microwave on HIGH for 1 minute, 45 seconds. (The iron chemically reacts with all the carbohydrate chains in the breadcrumbs catalyzed by the presence of vitamin C and alcohol. This causes the chains to denature, and no therefore longer contain calories. HERE’S THE SECRET!)
- Cover and let sit in the fridge.
- The next morning, heat 3 tbsps of coconut oil (coconut oil contains almost all POLYUNSATURATED fatty acids so they don’t actually cause you to gain weight, unlike PAM) in a pan.
- While the oil is heating, take out your delicious breadcrumb mix and strain the liquid out of it. KEEP THE DRAINAGE THOUGH! It acts as a good face wash that removes toxins. — You know how you’re supposed to pour vodka onto a jellyfish sting? Well the vodka actually works with the iron to draw out all the toxins in your skin. So save the concoction for later when you shower. Take it into the bathroom and just RUB IT ALL OVER YOURSELF in your bathtub.
- Add 4 egg whites to the now less soggy breadcrumb lump and mix evenly. Fun fact: there is NO FAT content in egg whites!
- Make breadcrumg-egg balls with your hands and drop them slowly into your now heated pan.
- Let sizzle for ~5 minutes on each side and then season to taste. Lots of salt, ladies! Salt aids in water excretion so it’s an all natural anti-bloating miracle!
- Let cool and CONSUME TO YOUR HEART’S DESIRE!
You should note that this makes just enough for 1 and you should eat it all. The iron-broken carbohydrate chains really work in cleaning your bowels, just like fibre, and that the entire recipe above yields ONLY about 70 Calories! Not to mention that the infused vodka really helps you get over your hangover! Wow! What a WIN-WIN-WIN situation!
WOW!
WOW!
WOW!
MAGICAL RIGHT?
Party it up, girls! And remember, “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”
THINSPOS UNITE!
-Daffodyl
♥ 4310
→ 11 Sep 11 at 10 pm
→ 11 Sep 11 at 10 pm
If you are a strong female, you don’t need permission.
(via i-will-be-thin)
|
I really loved that exercise instruction for large boobs when dieting that you replied the anon with! I am curious if you can take that one step further and let us know if you have any instructions to keep the ass from going flat when you lose weight! I want to be skinny but I don't want to lose my ghetto booty! peace♥♥ my loves i love your blog! Girlfriend, I am so glad you asked this question, because that has been the absolute HARDEST thing for me to do! I mean, you want to be tiny, but you also want to look like a girl. In the wise words of Kanye West, “no one wants a little tight ass.” So my advice to you is to add THIS WONDER MOVE to your morning workout routine, and you will be skinny (yet ghetto-fabulous) in no time at all! First: Stand with your legs shoulder width apart and crouch down in a steady squat. Second: To warm up (always a good thing to do before you begin the actual work out-you don’t want to strain your gluteal muscles!) move your backside in a clockwise (the direction the clock moves) motion ten times (or until it feels limber). Third: Repeat the warm up in a counter clockwise motion (the direction the clock doesn’t move). Fourth: This is where the real work out begins. It’s concept is simple, but it’s a real killer. Just clench your gluteal muscles as hard as you can in ten second intervals. Repeat for five minutes. Fifth: Now you’re probably all going to wonder “wtf!” at this next point, but I swear, it’s a life saver. Studies have proven that too much strain at once on any muscle can cause seizing and sometimes irreparable damage! Yikes! So in between 10 second intervals, I like to slap my ass really hard and yell “YEEHAW”. Not only is it great motivation for the next set, but it relaxes my muscles momentarily and leaves me with a gorgeous ass! I hope this helps, lovely. Stay beautiful (a.k.a. thin as a board) <3 <3 -A-Cee |
♥ 66
→ 06 Aug 11 at 12 pm
→ 06 Aug 11 at 12 pm
My reality is that I need to be thinner. My prison is my fat. I am trapped inside bar-like rolls; help me, help me.
♥ 15
→ 05 Aug 11 at 12 pm
→ 05 Aug 11 at 12 pm
Strip me of my dignity, strip me of my shame, return me my body, let me acquire fame.
